Parador

by Sean Daniel

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1.
Parador 04:34
I’m a man of simple trade, Moving things other made. Of modest ship and sail, Blown by the Western gale. Then one day in a port of call, My better judgement took to fall, To the ocean’s floor with the cannon balls, That fueled this revolution. Under Spanish sky, Through sixteen sailors she caught my eye. And tempted me to come swing by, And make an introduction. I swear I’d seen that face before, Was it in my dreams or the troubadour, Singing of a beauty born to heal a war-torn nation. When she put her hand in mine, And asked me for a little time to help, Occupy her mind from affairs not to be mentioned. We shared a kiss, yeah, maybe two, And spent the night as lovers do, In a parador beneath the moon, She told me of her secret. She’d given me a false name and royal blood, Flowed through her veins. Here she was a runaway, and I her entertainment. I don’t mind though it’s ok, We’ve all got a role to play. The next morning a rude awakening, The palace guards forced our door to break in, Searching for a high-born maiden, Laying by my side. When a turn and a gentle shake, Could not produce this girl to wake, She must have passed before day break, But at least she went out smiling. I said ‘Wait let me explain!’ But they came down on me like a heavy rain, Regained my wits before a kind, Screaming fire and brimstone. Carried down to a dungeon’s room, Through the bars the same bright moon, Reflecting off the sea. Cellmates with a memory. My prize for this misunderstanding, Seven days till the hangman’s landing. I knew I’d seen that face before, Both in my dreams and the troubadour singing, Of this civil war and the characters within it. When I put her hand in mine, I thrust myself to the front lines, Now I’m paying for my crime, Of loving her completely. Seven days quick turned to one, And one the eve my life was done, I heard someone from the other side, Urging me to step back. With a little work the wall was gone, And a band of men, a dozen strong, Collectively burst into song, Singing ‘Viva la Republica.’ Under Spanish sky, A fugitive fled into the night. Whose company was none too bright, Yet better than the gallows. So I joined a gang, No, rebellion’s a better name. And we took our claim to a flying piece of fabric. But in my heart there’s still a room, In a parador beneath the moon, That I go back to all time.
2.
Black Clouds 02:53
At this moment there’s nothing to do, But ask myself what’s even left to lose. What’s the point of a clean bill of health, Since my heart’s been broken I’ve worn it, So well. That no one around me can tell, The truth from this image I sell. When your guess is almost as good as mine. Back and forth above uneven ground, You’re testing the fences I built around. To be honest I’ll tell you the truth, Most of the time I was waiting, To lose. So I’d have a decent excuse. For the sleep that I lost over what we do. Just to be part of a vanishing. You hang like a black cloud, Over my head.
3.
Going Under 04:07
Got a foot in the grave, And an eye on the door. One bad, bad feeling and a dozen more, Looking in my direction. Calling me a fraud. Counting black clouds praying for a little rain, Flip a penny in the ocean and pray for a hurricane. Close my eyes, And feel the pressure change. Hold on, gotta hold on now. As it crumbles around me. Hold on, gotta hold on now, To the devil now that he’s found me. Can’t help myself, From going under. Last man standing holding onto the mast, I had a dream of dry land but it’s fading fast. Bodies fly, never gonna see you again. Picking last words, slipping off into the wind, ’Til my body hits the water then it’s sink or swim. Don’t look down, it’ll all be over soon. Hold on, gotta hold on now. As it crumbles around me. Hold on, gotta hold on now, To the devil now that he’s found me. Can’t help myself, From going under.
4.
Gone 02:47
In a season where the winds don’t change, I find myself, face down and dried out. Sorting out the bruises from the breaks. Dropped from a tidal high, I hit my head and I lost my mind. Who I came here with, is long, long gone. Bled my death wish dry, Now I’ve got nowhere to run. Washed in with the tide, And I’m not the only one. Lock eyes with a weary face, Like looking in a mirror from another time or place. Drifting aimlessly, barely stood upright. Then came the strangest thing, The water that was at my feet went back to the sea. Gone rolling back, carving out a graveyard. Bled my death wish dry, Now I’ve got nowhere to run. Washed in with the tide, Now the life I’d known is gone.
5.
Buried 04:59
I didn’t know what I was missing, How much had shook off when I came to, Came to my feet, and noticed. To come out of hiding wasn’t my plan, I tried to keep simple. Let all the color, dull, unsteady. ’Til I’m ready. I swore that I found every floor to fall through, On the way down, To a place I’d follow, and took every shortcut. At my worst, you got me together, And took me home. Told me the first, step to believing, Was letting go. Never could tell what’s meant to discover, And what’s meant to leave buried in the sand. Picking and choosing what to hold onto, And what’s a mistake, To carry, what I carried. I swore that I found every floor to fall through, On the way down, To a place I’d follow, and took every shortcut. At my worst, you got me together, And took me home. Told me the first, step to believing, Was letting go.
6.
Poison Pill 03:54
I’m getting further and further away, From the people I knew by more than a name or face, Marching deeper than, I’d ever thought to go. And I watch them one by one, Go into the fog and come out as someone else, Not for the better, if at all. Oh how fast they turn to go. And what’s behind that change I’ll never know. If I keep standing still then I might avoid that poison pill, We’re all seduced to take. What I’m expected to do, Is follow the leader through spirals and corkscrews, Eyes down, twisted round into a chain. Whatever comes my way, Gets beaten down and saved for another day. To be reckoned with or never realized. Oh how fast they turn to go, And what’s behind that change I’ll never know. It’s hard to stay the same when we’re all caught up in a number’s game, We all learn to count backwards.
7.
No Shelter 03:05
Come back empty handed, To the place I landed, Much worse for the wear. No shelter anymore, Shut out door to door. By a hostage of the home. Why do you not see me with, The clear eyes you used to draw me in. I’ve thought many times, There’s no reason or rhyme, To the crashing of the tides. I will find another way, To strike head on, if it’s my last.
8.
Death Bell 02:20
Gonna take the long way around, And drop my anchor where the thunder sounds. If it takes all blood-red night, I’ll be on the water ’till I find a fight. Cause my name’s got that death bell ringing, I’m going down, but I’ll go down swinging. Power in the numbers and an eye full of green, I got a pocket full of nothing and a head full of mean. Salt is in the air and it’s in my cut, The sharks are in the water and they’re looking for blood. A tidal wave could strike me down, And crush me in its hold. With no regrets and nothing left to lose. Bracing for the end cause I know, My name made the death bell ring so I’m gearing up for one last swing.
9.
Flash 03:19
My wits about me still, And a glowing that surrounds me. In a flash I was here, in the bat of an eye I’ll be gone just as quickly. Pages that have turned, Like leaves in a scatter. All out of order, to be put together. The hum and the draw, As we are descending. Set into motion the turn, With no sign of ending. Drill to the center, In the bat of an eye I’ll be gone just as quickly.
10.
Triggerman 06:44
Muffling my pride, Continuing to suffer. Holding in the cold, With nothing left to balance. My focus absentee, A sinister agenda. Fighting everyone who drew breath on, The day that you took over. I changed into this triggerman. Here I am, Surviving, and soon you’ll be, Shells and cobwebs of the now, Living in another time. Moving through the smoke, Shelter for the wicked. Burn from every angle above and below, Head down moving forward. ’Til I find the monster who did this to me. Here I am, Surviving, and soon you’ll be. Shell and cobwebs of the now, Living in another time. Reaching for the pain, Continuing the cycle. No reservations or excuses for, The day that I admitted. I turned into this triggerman. Here I am, Surviving, and soon you’ll be. Shell and cobwebs of the now, Living in another time.

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released December 31, 2016

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